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Reality kicks in…

So here is a personal story of what happened this week, I added a song below from Hillsong United in the Youtube vid that really speaks to me right now. It’s not a music video, just the song so you can listen to it while reading the post, or after you read it.. whatever you like of course!

Last Tuesday March 5th it was our first day to explore THE big city, New York. I was really excited and felt surprisingly fit despite of the cold. (big temperature difference with Florida!).

Because it was such a beautiful sunny day we decided to start of in Central Park. When we were about to take the metro my ‘fear’ became reality: stairs, a lot of stairs! But I already expected there wouldn’t be elevators on every station. But I still hoped I was wrong, it would have saved me a lot of energy if I didn’t have to walk all those stairs. Either way the metro works great and we can go everywhere we want with the metrocard!

To make a long story short; we started that day in Central Park and walked around (1/3 of) the park and ended up in the Central Park Zoo. We went in to the zoo for a quick view and had a blast! After that we walked over 5th avenue to The Empire State Building. On our way there we had something to eat and drink in an Irish Pub and around 8pm we entered the Observatory of the Empire State Building to take some shots for our film and a lot of photos of the amazing view on this clear night. And awesome it was! We stayed there for 1,5 hours in the cold night air and made some great shots. We even went all the way to the top on the 102nd floor! And yes, it was worth every penny!!

Then reality kicked in…

All day walking around Manhattan, filming, taking photos and the cold had exhausted me completed. But I still had to go back to my hotel in Queens by metro. The weird thing is that I felt really good through the day but on a moment like this all tiredness kicks in at the same time. My legs failed me when I walked down the stairs to enter the metro station and I slipped and fell. Luckily I didn’t fell hard and landed on the stairs. But I was too tired to get up by myself.

On moments like this I really hate my body and handicap. It feels like someone wants to screw up my awesome day. Besides that, Daan walked in front of me so he didn’t saw me fall. I had to call him so he could help me stand up. Daan turned around and his first response is “Whats up?”. Well you can’t make me more angry than asking me that question while I’m sitting on the ground not being able to stand up. I know it was an automatic response and he didn’t meant it that way. But on that brief moment that response made me feel totally alone for a second. I miss my family who know me more than anyone. And know exactly when there is something wrong and I need their help.

Daan tried helping me get up but that didn’t really work out on the narrow stairs. Luckily there was a stranger who saw me fall and helped me up again. Like an angel to help me as a wink that I’m not alone at all!

The trip back to the hotel went without trouble and I fell on my bed, exhausted! The next day I couldn’t leave the hotel room, that’s how tired my body was. Having an amazing view on the big city and only being able to look at it from my bed. These are the moments I hate, trapped by my body. These are the moments where I am confronted with my barriers.. I can jump high or low but it doesn’t matter. This is reality!

But what do I do with this feeling? I can have a shitty day in my hotel or I can try to enjoy the fact that I’m in NYC. I grab my computer and go over the 500 photos I made the day before in the city. I watch and edit them all, to enjoy them again! I take my time and stay in bed to give my body the rest it needs. I plan and look at the things I still want to see and experience here and I know that I will probably be fit again tomorrow to go out and explore the city.

Through the photos and memories of the day before I realize one thing, the beautiful things in life don’t always come easy. Sometimes there is a need for sacrifices to get to that place you want to be at. This is the sacrifice I have to make right now. To stay in bed for a day, but hey… I had one awesome day and I’ve been on the Empire State Building! IT WAS WORTH IT!!!

– Jordi